Fav for sure is "To Mother"... a close second are the Bananas ; )
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Spring Is Here -- er, Is It?
Spring is just around the corner!
Proper footwear is always recommended.
Hmm, have to click it to see it - video.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Surely it's about time I returned -- YEAHHH!
Okay, I've said it before, and I'll say it again (and hopefully this time--- mean it!)
I think I'm coming back!
Hubby is back into the blogging scene now with an election upon us (ugh, don't get me started)
I like to keep things airy, he likes to rage against the Liberals lol.
So ... that said, perhaps I should invest some time again into my own blog!
I've missed my loyals (are you still out there? I hope so!), I've missed the laughs and I've certainly missed sharing my twisted sense of humour with you all! (okay, not really twisted, just at times vulgar and dirrrty - it's the Brit in me!)
So..... guys, Welcome back to IcePrincess and lets have some fun!
I think I'm coming back!
Hubby is back into the blogging scene now with an election upon us (ugh, don't get me started)
I like to keep things airy, he likes to rage against the Liberals lol.
So ... that said, perhaps I should invest some time again into my own blog!
I've missed my loyals (are you still out there? I hope so!), I've missed the laughs and I've certainly missed sharing my twisted sense of humour with you all! (okay, not really twisted, just at times vulgar and dirrrty - it's the Brit in me!)
So..... guys, Welcome back to IcePrincess and lets have some fun!
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
:) Random Hi !!!
My bad, I know...
I had hoped I could come around and post every so often, which turned out to be umm, not so often at all.
Don't lose faith in me, I haven't closed this sucker down... and I don't plan to.
Once upon a time I had a lot of fun with my blogs. To be honest, I miss my old ones I had. This one that I restarted I did with mild effort only. Boo me.
Summer is totally started here for me, weather, activities and kids keeping me on my toes.
Hope everyone is well, busy and happy.
XO
Thursday, November 26, 2009
LOL!!! TEST TEST!!!
...test test as in, does anyone still come here?
Fawk sakes, haven't even opened my blog in EVERRRRR... so here I am, checking in... took me a few tries to access, as I forgot my password! LOL :)
Anyways, life has been busy and I kind of fell off the blog world. How is everyone?
My bad and sorry I abandoned you guys - Maybe I'll come back soon.
XO
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Dispute Between Neighbours!
Dispute Between Neighbours - apparently a true story... (?)
A town councillor in Wales, Mark Easton, had a beautiful view of the mountains, until a new neighbour purchased the land below his house and built a new home.
The new home was 18 inches higher than the planning dept had approved, so Mark Easton, mad about his lost view, went to the local authority to make sure they enforced the roof line height.
The new neighbour had to drop the roof height, at great expense. Recently, Mark Easton called the planning dept, and informed them that his new neighbour had installed some vents on the side of his new property.
Mark didn't like the look of these vents and asked the planning dept to investigate.
When they went to Mark's home to see what the vents looked like, this is what they found...
The Local Authority said the vents can stay since there is no planning law referring to shutter design
A town councillor in Wales, Mark Easton, had a beautiful view of the mountains, until a new neighbour purchased the land below his house and built a new home.
The new home was 18 inches higher than the planning dept had approved, so Mark Easton, mad about his lost view, went to the local authority to make sure they enforced the roof line height.
The new neighbour had to drop the roof height, at great expense. Recently, Mark Easton called the planning dept, and informed them that his new neighbour had installed some vents on the side of his new property.
Mark didn't like the look of these vents and asked the planning dept to investigate.
When they went to Mark's home to see what the vents looked like, this is what they found...
The Local Authority said the vents can stay since there is no planning law referring to shutter designFriday, April 10, 2009
Saturday, April 4, 2009
~Sports Page Sensitivity Test For Men~
1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:
A. Lovemaking.
B. Screwing.
C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town.
2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you have both shared:
A. Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship.
B. Your blood-test results.
C. Five tequila slammers.
3. You time your orgasm so that:
A. Your partner climaxes first.
B. You both climax simultaneously.
C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center.
4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
A. Healthy, creative love-play.
B. Not the sort of thing your wife would agree to.
C. Not the sort of thing your wife needs to ever find out about.
5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you have just had sex with is:
A. The best part of the experience.
B. The second best part of the experience.
C. $100 extra.
6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:
A. Of no influence on your affectionate feelings for her.
B. Not a problem, she can join your gym.
C. A conservative estimate.
7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:
A. A myth.
B. An oxymoron.
C. A moron.
8. Foreplay is to sex as:
A. An appetizer is to entree.
B. Primer is to paint.
C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.
9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
A. I hope we can still be friends.
B. I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep.
C. Welcome to Dumpsville. Population, YOU.
10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy.
B. Is uptight and a waste of time.
C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.
==================
Evaluating Results:
If you answered A more than 7 times, check your pants to make sure you really ARE a man.
If you answered B more than 7 times, check into therapy. You're a little confused.
If you answered C more than 7 times, YOU DA MAN!!!
A. Lovemaking.
B. Screwing.
C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town.
2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you have both shared:
A. Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship.
B. Your blood-test results.
C. Five tequila slammers.
3. You time your orgasm so that:
A. Your partner climaxes first.
B. You both climax simultaneously.
C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center.
4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
A. Healthy, creative love-play.
B. Not the sort of thing your wife would agree to.
C. Not the sort of thing your wife needs to ever find out about.
5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you have just had sex with is:
A. The best part of the experience.
B. The second best part of the experience.
C. $100 extra.
6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:
A. Of no influence on your affectionate feelings for her.
B. Not a problem, she can join your gym.
C. A conservative estimate.
7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:
A. A myth.
B. An oxymoron.
C. A moron.
8. Foreplay is to sex as:
A. An appetizer is to entree.
B. Primer is to paint.
C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.
9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
A. I hope we can still be friends.
B. I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep.
C. Welcome to Dumpsville. Population, YOU.
10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy.
B. Is uptight and a waste of time.
C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.
==================
Evaluating Results:
If you answered A more than 7 times, check your pants to make sure you really ARE a man.
If you answered B more than 7 times, check into therapy. You're a little confused.
If you answered C more than 7 times, YOU DA MAN!!!
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Gay Flight Attendant...
My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.
As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that 'Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just put your trays up, that would be super.'
On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather Arabic looking woman hadn't moved a muscle.
'Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines but I asked you to raise your trazy-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground.'
She calmly turned her head and said, 'In my country, I am called a Princess and I take orders from no one.'
To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat, 'Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you.
Tray-up, Bitch!
Friday, February 27, 2009
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
*Burning Questions*
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Why, Why, Why
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?'
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And my FAVORITE......
The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons are suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Calories Burned During Sex...
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent 12 Calories
Without her consent 2,187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands 8 Calories
With one hand 12 Calories
With your teeth 485 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection 6 Calories
Without an erection 3,315 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary 12 Calories
69 lying down 78 Calories
69 standing up 812 Calories
Wheelbarrow 216 Calories
Doggy Style 326 Calories
Italian chandelier 2,912 Calories
ORGASMS:
Real 112 Calories
Fake 1,315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging 18 Calories
Getting up immediately 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately 816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION:
If you are:
20-29 years 36 Calories
30-39 years 80 Calories
40-49 years 124 Calories
50-59 years 1,972 Calories
60-69 years 7,916 Calories
70 and over Results are still pending
DRESSING AFTERWARDS:
Calmly.. 32 Calories
In a hurry 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door 5,218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door 13,521 Calories
Results may vary!
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Girl/Guy - What goes through your mind when someone says "let's drink!"
(Click the images for a proper LARGE view)
Poor us!
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
SSSSSmart Cars!
Smorvette!
Smaudi AWD!
Smamborghini!
Smorsche!
Smorsche Targa!
Smerarri!
These things remind me of toys my friends little brother used to play with when we were kids... MICRO MACHINES!!!
Cute cars though!
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Happy Birthday to ME! 29+1=Eww!
January 19th is D Day, or is it B Day? hehehe.
How the FAWK am I 30???
I remember when my MOM was 30!!!
Whatev's... I dont' feel it!!! :)
xo
Friday, January 9, 2009
Friday, January 2, 2009
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Happy New Year!
Make it a memorable last night, of 2008!
I wish you and yours all the best for a happy healthy 2009!
Friday, December 26, 2008
I'm tired...almost over...
Yep - linin' up for my Timmy's - to WAKE THE F#%@ UP!!!~
~
~
We switched it up this holiday season and DID not travel all over the map, instead opting to stay home and have people come to us!
Was nice not travelling Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and the days following.
We broke our parents family tradition of having "us kids" around and are creating our own now that we have our own kids.
Let me tell ya, I'm still just as tired having them come to us! Lots of cooking and cleaning - shit!
We had a nice Christmas, hope you and yours did too!
xo
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